Chuck Norris can wipe rainwater from inside his car.
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After Chuck Norris sweats the sweat evaporates into the sky and forms what we call lightning.
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While vacationing in a remote area of Alaska, I met an old mountain man, wise in the ways one need be to live in an extreme wilderness area like he did. I asked him about the weater, did it rain a lot? He said; "See those mountains over there" and he pointed to them." I replied, "Yes." "Well," he replied, ".. if you can't see those mountains, that means it's raining. If you can see them, that means it's going to rain."
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Yo Momma so fat, she rolled out of bed and everybody thought there was an earthquake.
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Q: Did you hear the joke about an Earthquake and Japanese nuclear reactor? A: Not cool.
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