Yo mama so fat when she burped New Orleans thought Katrina came back to finish the job.

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It is so cold outside I saw a politician with his hands in his own pockets.

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What are the similarities between a new wife and a tornado, there's a lot of suckin and blowin and then u lose ur house.

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While vacationing in a remote area of Alaska, I met an old mountain man, wise in the ways one need be to live in an extreme wilderness area like he did. I asked him about the weater, did it rain a lot? He said; "See those mountains over there" and he pointed to them." I replied, "Yes." "Well," he replied, ".. if you can't see those mountains, that means it's raining. If you can see them, that means it's going to rain."

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Question: Why are hurricanes sometimes named after women? Answer: When they come they’re wild and wet, but when they go they take your house and car with them.

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