It only rains twice a year in Seattle: August through April and May through July.

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Vaginas are like weather. When it's wet, it's time to go inside.

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Climate change is just Chuck Norris playing with the thermostat.

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Hurricane Katrina wasn't the weather... it was the wind of a Chuck Norris roundhouse kick from Texas to Louisiana.

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Two blondes lock their keys in the car. One of the blondes tries to break into the car while the the other one watches. Finally the first blonde says "Darn, I can't get in the car!" The other blond replies, "keep trying, it looks like it is going to rain and the top is down".

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