Chuck Norris owns the gold color at the end of the rainbow.

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It is so cold outside I saw a politician with his hands in his own pockets.

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Vaginas are like weather. When it's wet, it's time to go inside.

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The wind is Chuck Norris breathing.

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While vacationing in a remote area of Alaska, I met an old mountain man, wise in the ways one need be to live in an extreme wilderness area like he did. I asked him about the weater, did it rain a lot? He said; "See those mountains over there" and he pointed to them." I replied, "Yes." "Well," he replied, ".. if you can't see those mountains, that means it's raining. If you can see them, that means it's going to rain."

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