Jill: "How did you find the weather on your vacation?" Bill: "I just went outside and there it was!"

 10317

3  

Chuck Norris owns the gold color at the end of the rainbow.

 330

0  

Yo mama so fat when she burped New Orleans thought Katrina came back to finish the job.

 287

0  

Yo' mama so stupid, she thought the Blizzard of '96 was a new item at Dairy Queen!

 400

1  

It only rains twice a year in Seattle: August through April and May through July.

 7457

1