I don't understand why I'm single my hobbies include smelling my own hair and bragging about how I'm immune to bats.

 1274

0  

Q. What is the one thing that all men at singles bars have in common? A. They're married.

 873

0  

Two old people flirt at a seniors' singles bar. After a few drinks, the old man asks the old woman, "If I took you out for a full night of wining, dining and dancing, what would you wear?" The old woman replies shyly, "Depends..." "Depends on what?" he asks. "On my bottom - where else?!"

 1594

1  

Relationship Status: just tried to reach for my dog's paw and he pulled it away so I pretended I was reaching for the remote.

 1582

1  

Happy Father's Day to the top three most likely candidates.

 1641

0