If tinder has taught me one thing it's that there is an extraordinary amount of single girls named Shelby that love to ride horses
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Just heard someone bragging about his one night stand. Whatever mate, I've got two night stands. Either side of my bed.
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5 stages of being single: denial, anger, bargaining, depression, texting your ex something random then going like "sorry wrong message".
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I don't understand why I'm single my hobbies include smelling my own hair and bragging about how I'm immune to bats.
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'You're beautiful and I love you," I yelled as I stood alone on the cliff, and my echo replied "I just want to be friends."
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