Happy Father's Day to the top three most likely candidates.

 1635

0  

Me: "I'm so lonely." Person: "Hey!" Me: "Leave me alone."

 1255

1  

Q. What is the one thing that all men at singles bars have in common? A. They're married.

 870

0  

Relationship Status: just tried to reach for my dog's paw and he pulled it away so I pretended I was reaching for the remote.

 1578

1  

5 stages of being single: denial, anger, bargaining, depression, texting your ex something random then going like "sorry wrong message".

 1557

1