Q. What is the one thing that all men at singles bars have in common? A. They're married.

 896

0  

Relationship Status: just tried to reach for my dog's paw and he pulled it away so I pretended I was reaching for the remote.

 1596

1  

Me: "I'm so lonely." Person: "Hey!" Me: "Leave me alone."

 1278

1  

Happy Father's Day to the top three most likely candidates.

 1656

0  

Q: What's the difference between me and a calendar? A: A calendar has dates.

 1770

1