Relationship Status: just tried to reach for my dog's paw and he pulled it away so I pretended I was reaching for the remote. 1749 1
Being single is cool cause you can eat a whole jar of pepperoncinis and spend the rest of the night farting spicily into the abyss. 1627 0
5 stages of being single: denial, anger, bargaining, depression, texting your ex something random then going like "sorry wrong message". 1701 1
