Mothers have Mother's Day and fathers have Father's Day. What do single guys have? Palm Sunday.

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Q: What's the difference between me and a calendar? A: A calendar has dates.

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If tinder has taught me one thing it's that there is an extraordinary amount of single girls named Shelby that love to ride horses

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"You're single and I'm single too! You know what that means?" "What" "We're both ugly!"

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Sometimes I wonder if I'm pregnant and then I realize I would have to be like 19 months pregnant.

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