Two old people flirt at a seniors' singles bar. After a few drinks, the old man asks the old woman, "If I took you out for a full night of wining, dining and dancing, what would you wear?" The old woman replies shyly, "Depends..." "Depends on what?" he asks. "On my bottom - where else?!"
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"You're single and I'm single too! You know what that means?" "What" "We're both ugly!"
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5 stages of being single: denial, anger, bargaining, depression, texting your ex something random then going like "sorry wrong message".
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If tinder has taught me one thing it's that there is an extraordinary amount of single girls named Shelby that love to ride horses
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Relationship Status: just tried to reach for my dog's paw and he pulled it away so I pretended I was reaching for the remote.
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