'You're beautiful and I love you," I yelled as I stood alone on the cliff, and my echo replied "I just want to be friends."

 2246

1  

I don't understand why I'm single my hobbies include smelling my own hair and bragging about how I'm immune to bats.

 1393

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If tinder has taught me one thing it's that there is an extraordinary amount of single girls named Shelby that love to ride horses

 2378

1  

"You're single and I'm single too! You know what that means?" "What" "We're both ugly!"

 4738

1  

Just heard someone bragging about his one night stand. Whatever mate, I've got two night stands. Either side of my bed.

 1116

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