If Charlie Sheen is winning, it's only because Chuck Norris isn't playing.

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First Michael Jackson and now Neil Armstrong... God is clearly no fan of moonwalkers.

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How come the village Guy Fawkes won the Nobel Peace Prize? Cause he was outstanding in his field.

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Chuck Norris once shook a pirates hand. That pirate is now known as Captain Hook

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Jason Bourne is Chuck Norris' daughter...

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