What famous painting do cows love to look at? The Moona Lisa.
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Why doesn't Osama bin Laden have sex with his five wives? Because every time he spreads their legs he sees Bush.
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Chuck Norris is the reason why Professor X is on a wheelchair.
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Randy Johnson can throw a fastball 101mph. Chuck Norris can throw Randy Johnson 101mph.
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Three boys walk through the woods and suddenly hear cries for help. They follow the sound to the lake and see George W. Bush drowning. The boys jump into the water and drag him to shore. Bush asks the boys how he can repay them. The first boy says, "I want a boat." The second boy says, "I want a truck." The third boy says, "I want a nice tombstone." Bush asks, "Why is that?" The boy says, "Because when my dad finds out I helped save you, he's going to kill me."
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