Stevie Wonder recently told his wife that he wants to see other people.
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What's the difference betwee Elton John and Princess Diana ? One's composing, the other is decomposing.
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Every time you're sad, just remember that somewhere out there a tree grew for years and years, but was then destroyed and became material for a Justin Bieber notebook.
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Bill Gates and Jim Cannavino from IBM are arguing about the future of 32-bit operating systems. They decide to throw a coin. Cannavino: "If the number is up, OS/2 will be the new standard, if it’s head Windows95 will be the new standard." Gates: "Hey, you forgot Windows NT." Cannavino: "No, I didn’t. If the coin falls on end, Windows NT will be the future."
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When Teddy Rosavelt said there is nothing to fear but fear itself he obiously hadn't met Chuck Norris.
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