If you need Facebook to remind you it's your wife's birthday, I hope you own a comfortable couch.

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This blonde goes into the drugstore looking for a birthday card. She asks the clerk if they have any new and different cards — something unusual. The clerk points her to a new card just in that day — “Happy Birthday to the Boy who Popped My Cherry.” The blonde replied, “How cool! I’ll take the whole box!”

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The most effective way to remember your wife's birthday is to forget it once.

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Its my birthday today. My wife has said that shes going to make it my most special birthday ever... I wonder where shes going ?

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After Chuck Norris was born, he drove himself back home.

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