Q: What's a terrorists favorite American football team? A: The New York Jets.

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Q: What does a Polish bride get on her wedding night that's long and hard? A: A new last name.

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Jamaica has named Usain Bolt its Sportsman of the Year. In related news, the island has also made Michael Phelps an honorary citizen.

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A stranger walks up to an Egyptian man at the Cairo bazaar and offers to sell him contraband Viagra for 100 Egyptian pounds. The Egyptian man says, "No, not worth it." The stranger says, "How about 20?" The Egyptian man says, "No, not worth it." The stranger says, "How about 10?" The Egyptian man says, "No, not worth it." The stranger says, "Listen, these pills cost $10 each in the U.S. How can you say they're not worth it?" The Egyptian man says, "Oh, the pills are worth it my wife isn't."

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My Chinese friend died recently, So Yung.

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