“The Day the Earth Stood Still” is based off the one day in Earth’s history when Chuck Norris slept.

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The answer to all the questions on your history test tomorrow is Chuck Norris.

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Nate: Why was school easier for cave people? Kate: Why? Nate: Because there was no history to study!

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Reading Chuck Norris Facts is the same as learning history.

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Who's the biggest prostitute in history? Ms. Pacman, for 25 cents that b*tch swallowed balls till she died.

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