During the soccer match little Johny sits in the front row. His friend asks: How did you get tickets? From my brother - respond Petya. And where is your brother? At home. Looking for his ticket.

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Barcelona beats every team in the world, Chuck Norris can beat Barcelona... by himself.

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Chuck Norris used to be a soccer referee. He lost the job after giving penalties to the players: Death Penalty.

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Did you hear the NFL is changing the color off the football to green? Yeah, you ever hear of a black person droping a watermelon?

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On the ninth day, God said, "Let there be soccer." And it was good. Later on that day, God said, "Let there be one team to rule the others and set the standard for excellence." God said, "Let it be called the Manchester United." Later that day, God said, "Even Man U needs idiots." So HE made their fans.

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