A couple returns from their honeymoon refusing to speak to each other. The groom's best friend takes him aside and asks what's wrong. "Well," replies the man, "when we finished making love on the first night, I put a $50 bill on the pillow without thinking." "Oh, you shouldn't worry about that too much," says his friend. "I'm sure your wife will get over it soon enough. She can't expect you to have been saving yourself all these years." "That's not the problem, " the groom says. "She gave me $20 change!"

How do you know when you honeymoon is over? When he no longer smiles as he scrapes the burnt toast.

When Superman wants vacation time it has to be approved by Chuck Norris.

Q: Why dont blacks celebrate Thanksgiving? A: Because KFC isn't open on holidays.

Chuck Norris goes to the Bermuda Triangle for vacation.