The ladies say I'm like Usain Bolt in the bedroom... I usually wear a yellow and green vest.

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A javelin thrower called Vicky Found the grip of her javelin sticky. When it came to the throw She couldn't let go. Making judging the distance quite tricky.

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Fan: "I see you won a silver medal at the Olympics. What's it for?¨" Athlete: "It's for telling knock knock jokes." Fan: "And what's that gold medal for?" Athlete: "For stopping."

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Oh, you play racquetball? You must be extremely athletic.

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An elderly patient needs a heart transplant and discusses his options with his doctor. The doctor says, ‘We have three possible donors. One is a young, healthy athlete. The second is a middleaged businessman who never drank or smoked, and the third is an attorney who just died after practising law for 30 years.’ ‘I’ll take the lawyer’s heart,’ says the patient. ‘Why?’ asks the doctor. The patient replies, ‘It’s never been used.’

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