Jamaica has named Usain Bolt its Sportsman of the Year. In related news, the island has also made Michael Phelps an honorary citizen.

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Peter: Why was the Olympian not able to listen to music? Matthew: Why? Peter: Because he broke the record!

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Q: If athletes get athlete's foot, what do elves get? A: Mistle-toes!

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Light was heard saying to his son, "Keep practicing and one day you will be faster than the speed of Usain."

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Oh, you play racquetball? You must be extremely athletic.

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