The ladies say I'm like Usain Bolt in the bedroom... I usually wear a yellow and green vest.

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Peter: Why was the Olympian not able to listen to music? Matthew: Why? Peter: Because he broke the record!

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Who was the fastest runner? Adam. He was first in the human race.

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Two girl sprinters are training for the 100 metres race. One says to the other: "You won't believe this, but I've just run 100 metres in 10 seconds." The other says: "But that's impossible, that's the world record." So the other says: "Ah hah, but I took a short cut."

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You're not alone. Sometimes, even Usain Bolt feels like he's running in circles.

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