So I heard the reason Usain Bolt is so fast is because his offseason training consists of going back home and hitting on dudes.

 1265

0  

Jamaica has named Usain Bolt its Sportsman of the Year. In related news, the island has also made Michael Phelps an honorary citizen.

 1334

1  

Light was heard saying to his son, "Keep practicing and one day you will be faster than the speed of Usain."

 801

0  

An elderly patient needs a heart transplant and discusses his options with his doctor. The doctor says, ‘We have three possible donors. One is a young, healthy athlete. The second is a middleaged businessman who never drank or smoked, and the third is an attorney who just died after practising law for 30 years.’ ‘I’ll take the lawyer’s heart,’ says the patient. ‘Why?’ asks the doctor. The patient replies, ‘It’s never been used.’

 1150

0  

Did you hear about the hopeless athlete? He ran a bath and came in second.

 732

3