Chuck Norris created the platypus by roundhouse kicking a duck at a beaver.
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Q: What can a goose do that a duck can't do and a lawyer should do?
A: Stick his bill up his ass.
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Q: Why did the duck go to Brooklyn?
A: To buy some quack.
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Little Johnny's teacher asks him to make a sentence using the following words: defeat, deduct, defense and detail.
Little Johnny says, "De feet of de duck went over de fence before de tail."
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I saw some ducks practicing their teenage girl faces at the pond today.
