Scientists believe that a giant meteor killed off the dinosaurs. This is true, if you can consider Chuck Norris to be a giant meteor.

One day a group of engineers got together and decided that man had come a long way and no longer needed God. They picked one engineer to go and tell Him that they were done with Him. The engineer walked up to God and said, "God, we've decided that we no longer need you. We're to the point that we can clone people and do many miraculous things, so why don't you just go on and get lost." God listened patiently to the man and after the engineer was done talking, God said, "Very well! How about this? Let's have a man-making contest." The man replied, "Okay, great!" But God added, "Now we're g ... read more

Chuck Norris made Newton write 3 laws of physics just to break them... he was having a boring weekend.

In 1986 the U.S.S.R. attempted to clone Chuck Norris. The scientists failure was covered up and we now know their attempt as the Chernobyl disaster.

Q: What was the blonde psychic's greatest achievment?  A: An IN-body experience!