If Chuck Norris were a calendar, every month would be named Chucktober, and every day he'd kick your ass.
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What happened when the cannibal got a religion? He only ate Catholics on Fridays!
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Big inspection on a build site/yard. The boss tells the workers : what ever happens just act as usual. The inspection committee were inspecting when a wall just colapses. -(Worker looking at his watch) : 10:15, just on time
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I'm tired 8 days a week.
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One attractive young businesswoman to another over lunch: "My life is all math. I am trying to add to my income, subtract from my weight, divide my time, and avoid multiplying."
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