There is no 'ctrl' button on Chuck Norris's computer. Chuck Norris is always in control.

 415

0  

Yo' Mama is so stupid, she smashed open her TV hoping to find a TV dinner.

 367

0  

A wife send her husband an sms on a cold winter evening: "Windows frozen". The husband send answer back: "Pour some warm water over them". Some time later husband receives answer from his wife: "The computer is completely fucked now".

 897

0  

Peter: "Your secretary is very sexy..." Tony: "Thanks! It's a robot actually, named 'Maria'. If you squeeze her right boob, she takes dictation & if you squeeze her left boob, she types letters! I'll Lend it to you for a day & you can see her functions..." Next day Peter called Tony from hospital & shouted: "You bastard!" You didn't tell me that the "HOLE" between Maria's legs is a pencil sharpener.

 594

0  

Chuck Norris can comment on Facebook posts, before you publish them.

 531

0