Yo momma so FAT, she can't save files bigger than 4 GB.
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There's a technical term for a sunny, warm day which follows two rainy days. It's called Monday.
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My grandfather once told me "your generation is too reliant on technology." So I replied "no, your generation is too reliant on technology!" Then I disconnected his life support.
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Chuck Norris can comment on Facebook posts, before you publish them.
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There was once a young man who, in his youth, professed his desire to become a great writer. When asked to define "Great" he said, "I want to write stuff that the whole world will read, stuff that people will react to on a truly emotional level, stuff that will make them scream, cry, howl in pain and anger!" He now works for Microsoft, writing error messages.
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