My 1st time having sex. I suddenly stopped and didn't move.
She: "What are you doing?"
Me: "I've seen this on YouPorn, it's called Buffering.
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A woman goes into a noisy launderette and asks the assistant to do a service wash.
‘What?!’ shouts the assistant.
‘Come again?!’
‘No!’ shouts back the woman.
‘This time it’s mustard!’
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Vaginas are like weather.
When it's wet, it's time to go inside.
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Chuck Norris always has s*x on the bottom.
Because he never f*cks up.
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Q: What does a good steak have in common with good sex?
A: They're both very rare.
