The wife bought a new see through nighty, wore it without any underclothes and came swinging before the husband. Aroused Husband says, "You look so beautiful and sexy my darling." The wife says, "I know that, I tried it the same way at the store and the salesman was the first one to tell me that."

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Why do men like having sex with the lights on? It makes it easier to put a name to the face.

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Q: What's the difference between a hooker and a drug dealer? A: A hooker can wash her crack and sell it again.

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Q: How do you make four old ladies say "FUCK!"? A: Get a fifth one to yell "BINGO!"

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‘After making love, I said to my girl, “Was it good for you too?” And she said, “I don’t think this was good for anybody.”’ Garry Shandling

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