I tried some of that aphrodisiac rhino horn. Now I’ve got an overwhelming desire to charge at Land Rovers.

Two hookers standing on a street corner started discussing business. One of the hookers said, "Gonna be a good night, I smell cock in the air." The other hooker looked at her and said, "Sorry No, I just burped."

Little Johnny asks, "Mommy, where do babies come from?" His mother replies, "The stork brings them." Little Johnny, puzzled, asks, "Then who fucks the stork?"

Having sex is like playing bridge. If you don't have a good partner, you'd better have a good hand.

The honeymoon couple left the wedding reception and hailed a cab to take them to their romantic boutique hotel in the hills. The driver wasn’t too sure how to get there, so he told the couple he would ask directions when they got closer to their destination. Meanwhile, the lovers couldn’t wait to get busy, so they got down to business in the back seat. During the couple’s moment of passion, the cabdriver noticed a fork in the road, and said, "I take the next turn, right?" "Screw NO, get your own woman," said the groom, "this one’s all mine!"