Religion is a lot more like politics.
The only difference is that with religion you get to confess your own sins.
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Q: What do you call a snake who works for the government?
A: A civil serpent.
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Q: What's the difference between death and taxes?
A: Congress doesn't meet every year to make death worse.
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Q: When will scientists cure the common cold?
A: Actually, they already did but Republican pharmacists won't dispense it because they mistook it for birth control.
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How did Barack propose to Michelle?
He got on one knee, pulled out a ring, and said "I don't wanna be obamaself."
