Chuck Norris doesn't vote. He elects!
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Yo mama's so fat that even Barack Obama couldn't afford to take her out to dinner.
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What did Barack Obama become after his forty-seventh year? "Forty-eight years old."
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It was a celebratory mood with the boys at NASA; they had just made the scientific achievement of a lifetime. As they were uncorking a bottle of champagne, Dr. Lowenstein, the head scientist at NASA, asked everyone to be quiet as he had received a congratulatory phone call from the President of the United States. He picked up a special red phone, and spoke into it. "Mr. President," said Dr. Lowenstein, grinning broadly, "after twelve years of hard research and billions of dollars spent, we have finally found intelligent life on Mars." He listened for a second, and his smile gradually disap ... read more
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How did Barack propose to Michelle? He got on one knee, pulled out a ring, and said "I don't wanna be obamaself."
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