Yo mama's so fat that even Barack Obama couldn't afford to take her out to dinner.
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A government employee sat in his office, and out of boredom, decided to see what was inside his old filing cabinet. He poked through the contents and came across an old brass lamp. "This will look good on my mantel," he said, and took it home with him. While polishing the lamp, a genie appeared and, as usual, granted him three wishes. "I would like an ice-cold Coke right now." He gets his Coke and drinks it. Now that he can think more clearly, he states his second wish. "I wish to be on an island with beautiful women, who find me irresistible." Suddenly, he's on an island with gor ... read more
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If Chuck Norris ran for president, the competition would drop out, and he would get infinite terms.
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Religion is a lot more like politics. The only difference is that with religion you get to confess your own sins.
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A reporter asked Chris Rock who do you think would win the presidency? He said quickly Obama. When asked why, he replied, has anyone ran a race with a Kenyan and won?
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