Q: What do you call a pothead that doesn't inhale? A: Mr. President.

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Yo mama's so fat that even Barack Obama couldn't afford to take her out to dinner.

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Chuck Norris was asked if he would be running for President, after a chuckle, he stated, nothing makes him run.

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How has Jesse Jackson lost the vote of most niggers? He promised to create jobs for them if elected.

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Abraham Lincoln can finish a play better than the 2013 Broncos.

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