Q: Have you heard about McDonald's new Obama Value Meal? A: Order anything you like and the guy behind you has to pay for it.

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Q: Why do they say elephants never forget? A: They haven't met Alberto Gonzalez.

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Q: What is a Democratic Free Market? A: One that hands out slices of cheese.

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It is so cold outside I saw a politician with his hands in his own pockets.

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Don’t steal, don’t lie and don’t cheat. The government hates competition.

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