911 calls Chuck Norris for emergency.
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The manager of the liquor store gets a phone call at 8 pm. "At what time do you open tomorrow?" asked the caller. "At nine," he answered. The phone rings at midnight "What time do you open ... in the morning?" "At nine". The phone rings at 4 in the morning "Whatt tim do ya openn in the mornin?" "I told you before at nine". "Imm just inn aa hury cause i got locked in tha stor las nite."
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Baby, if you were an iPhone 6, I would tap you all day!
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Police label anyone attacking Chuck Norris as a Code 45-11... a suicide.
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Why did Steve Jobs live his last moments in regret? They say your life flashes before your eyes just before you die. Unfortunately for Steve Jobs, his iPhone 4S didn't have a Flash player installed!
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