Q: How many Apple Iphone 6 early adopters does it take to change a light bulb? A: 3001. 1 to do the work and 3000 to go online and bitch about the lack of obscure features!
 672
0  

Dave and Jim were a couple of drinking buddies who worked as Aircraft mechanics in Melbourne. One day the airport was fogged in and they were stuck in the hangar with nothing to do.  Dave said, "Man, I wish we had something to drink!" Jim says, "Me too. Y'know, I've heard you can drink jet fuel and get a buzz. You wanna try it?"  So they pour themselves a couple of glasses of high octane booze and get completely smashed. The next morning Dave wakes up and is surprised at how good he feels. In fact he feels GREAT! NO hangover! NO bad side effects. Nothing!  Then the phone rin ... read more
 1100
0  

Yo mama's so fat, she's got more chins than a Hong Kong phonebook.
 362
0  

When Alexander Bell invented the telephone he had three missed calls from Chuck Norris
 266
0  

A guy tells his friends: The girl I was dating broke my heart, so I broke her Apple iPhone 5. You all know who cried more
 1021
0