Did you hear about the music app that is preloaded on every iPhone 6 plus? GarageBend.

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Q: Whats the difference between Amy Winehouse and Captain Morgan? A: Captain Morgan comes alive when you add coke!

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Gordan Ramsey:Theres more smoke in this kitchen than snopp dogg tour bus.

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Yo mama's so fat, she walked across the dance-floor...and the band skipped!

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I watched Justin Bieber get shot in CSI and my brother asked "Why are you crying?" I said "Because he didn't die in real life"

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