The Beatles originally sang "All you need is Chuck Norris".

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Chuck Norris can play the saxophone... while holding his breath.

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Q: "What's the difference between a guitar and a fish?" A: "You can't tuna fish."

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Chuck Norris killed the devil and is selling his own line of Picks of Destiny, available in all Chuck Norris approved guitar shops.

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I thought I was at a Nicki Minaj concert for 20 minutes before I realized I was just watching a homeless man yell at a pigeon.

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