Chuck Norris won one million dollars gambling playing Solitaire.

Yo' Mama is so poor, her bathroom consists of a tin can and a pile of leaves.

Yo' Mama is so poor, her face is on the food stamp.

I saw a tramp who was so broke he was standing on the corner shouting, ‘Will work for cardboard and a magic marker!’

A blonde hurries into the emergency room late one night with the tip of her index finger shot off. “How did this happen?” the emergency room doctor asked her. “Well, I was trying to commit suicide,” the blonde replied. “What?” sputtered the doctor. “You tried to commit suicide by shooting your finger off?” “No silly!” the blonde said. “First I put the gun to my chest, and I thought: I just paid $6,000.00 for these breast implants, I’m not shooting myself in the chest.” “So then?” asked the doctor. “Then I put the gun in my mouth, and I thought: I just paid $3000.00 to get my teeth straig ... read more