Yo' Mama is so poor, when she farts, her holey underwear whistles.

 538

0  

An old Jewish beggar was out on the street, begging with his tin cup. A man passed by and the beggar said to the man, "Sir, could you spare 3 cents for a cup of coffee?" And the man said, "Where do get coffee for 3 cents?" And the beggar said, "Who buys retail?"

 717

1  

A guy goes into a bar, orders twelve shots and starts drinking them as fast as he can. The bartender says, "Dang, why are you drinking so fast?" The guy says, "You would be drinking fast if you had what I had." The bartender says, "What do you have?" The guy says, "75 cents."

 503

0  

Question: What’s six inches long and two inches wide and drives women wild? Answer: Money.

 215

1  

He was so mean that when he found a pack of corn plasters he went out and bought a pair of tight shoes.

 179

0