‘If you pick up a starving dog and make him prosperous, he will not bite you. This is the principal difference between a dog and a man.’ Mark Twain
 190
0  

An actuary priced an automobile ‘fire and theft’ policy with an extremely low premium. When asked why it was so cheap, he said, ‘Who’d steal a burnt car?’
 188
0  

Yo' Mama is so poor, her bathroom consists of a tin can and a pile of leaves.
 210
0  

How do you start a Jewish parade? Throw a penny down main street.
 652
2  

Who was the greatest financier in the Bible? Noah - he was floating his stock while everyone was in liquidation.
 915
0