I visited my EX girlfriend and she gave me food.
After a few second their dog came in and started to jump over and I said “this dog loves visitors”
A child replied, “No! No! Uncle, the problem is that you are using its plate”.
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A woman will always forgive & forget.. But she'll never let u forget that she had forgiven & forgotten.. :-P
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A guy in a plane stood up & shouted: “HIJACK!”
All passengers got scared
From the other end of the plane, a guy shouted back “HI JOHN”.
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Why is Facebook such a hit? It works on the principle that- People are more interested in others life than their own-!
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Teacher: Anyone who thinks he’s stupid may stand up!
*Nobody stands up*
Teacher: I’m sure there are some stupid students over here!
*Little Johnny stands up*
Teacher: Oh, Johnny you think you’re stupid?
Little Johnny: No… I just feel bad that you’re standing alone.