A guy in a plane stood up & shouted: “HIJACK!” All passengers got scared From the other end of the plane, a guy shouted back “HI JOHN”.

Grandfather: When I was your age, I used to go to the market with two Rupees and bring home soap, rice, milk, bread, ghee, face powder etc. Grandson: nowadays it is difficult. There are CCTV cameras everywhere.

Interviewer: How much milk do these cows give? Farmer: Which one? The Black one or the brown one? Interviewer: Brown one. Farmer: A couple of liters per day. Interviewer: And the black one? Farmer: A couple of liters per day. Interviewer (naturally a bit flummoxed): I see. What do you give them to eat? Farmer: Which one? Black or brown? Interviewer: Black. Farmer: It eats grass. Interviewer: And the other one? Farmer: Grass. Interviewer (now annoyed): Why do you keep asking which one when the answers are the same? Farmer: Because, the black one’s mine. Interviewer: Oh, and the br ... read more

A man meets an accident with his new Ferrari. A policeman arrives. Man: (Cried) Officer! My brand new car! Police: You’re such a materialistic person. You even haven’t notice that your left arm has been cut off. Man: (He looks at his left arm and yells) OMG! My Rolex watch!

Diner: I can't eat such a rotten chicken.Call the manager! Waiter: It's no use. He won't eat it either.