Q: What is the difference between a puppy and a man? A: Eventually the puppy will grow up and stop whining.

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Why are men like laxatives? They can irritate the s**t out of you.

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Q: Why do men like blonde jokes? A: Because they can understand them.

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What should you give a man who has everything? A. A woman to show him how to work it. B. Penicillin.

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Men are like......Bananas. The older they get, the less firm they are

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