"What is a man's idea of a balanced diet?" "A Budweiser in each hand!"

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How to Impress a Woman: compliment her, kiss her, caress her, love her, comfort her, protect her, hold her, spend money on her, wine & dine her, listen to her, stand by her, support her, go to the ends of the earth for her. How to Impress a Man: show up naked, bring beer.

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Why did the blonde have a sore belly button? Because there are blonde men too!

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Q:What’s the difference between Ross Perot and Barack Obama? A:Ross Perot is crackpot with big ears and Barack Obama is a pothead with big ears.

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What do you call the useless piece of skin on a penis? The man.

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