Boy: "You know unlike all these other guys, I can make you really happy" Girl: "Why are you leaving?"
 1138
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A rabbi and a priest crash into each other at a four-way junction. They both get out of their cars and look at the wreck. They both thank God they are OK, and the priest says, ‘This must be a sign that God wanted us to meet.’ The rabbi says, ‘Yes, indeed, let’s drink.’ So the rabbi gets out some wine. They toast each other and the priest drinks his glass. But the rabbi doesn’t take a taste of his drink. Priest: ‘Why aren’t you drinking?’ Rabbi: ‘I’m waiting for the police.’
 1785
1  

Q: What does the sign on an out-of-business brothel say? A: Beat it. We're closed.
 1589
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Q: What do you call a person who keeps on talking when people are no longer interested? A: A teacher.
 1154
1  

The whole idea of Jesus dying to pay for our sins is bullshit. Jews don't pay for anything.
 1419
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