Boy: "You know unlike all these other guys, I can make you really happy" Girl: "Why are you leaving?"

 1148

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Q: What happens when you give Viagra to lawyers? A: They grow taller!

 1076

0  

The wild and mean bear grabs the hedgehog and asks him: "Were you at the fox’s party as well?" "Yes, I was. So what?" "Were you sitting on the table?" "Yeah, why?" The bear, ready to leg press him, changes his mind and says to the hedgehog: "Next time, wherever you go, take an umbrella with you!" "But why, my friend?" the hedgehog wonders. "Cause all night long, I was taking thorns off my ass!"

 886

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He was such an egotist that he joined the navy so the world could see him.

 1265

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A man calls 911 emergency: " Come immediately, my little son has swallowed a condom!" After five minutes, the same man calls back: "It is ok, I found another one."

 677

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