What do you call a truck full of dildos? Toys for Twats.

Chuck Norris does not masturbate, because there is no greater pleasure than being Chuck Norris.

The proprietor of an adult store steps out to run a few errands and leaves his employee in charge. A woman comes in and wants to purchase a dildo. She looks at the shelf behind the register. "How much for the white one?" "$10." "How much for the black one?" "$20." She buys the white one. A little later , another woman comes in and also wants to buy a dildo. After asking the clerk for prices, she decides on the black one. A third lady comes in for a dildo. She checks the price of the white one , the black one and asks about the plaid one. She makes her purchase and leaves.Th ... read more

Q: How do you cancel an appointment at a sperm bank? A: Tell them you can't cum.

What’s red, black, red, black, red, black, red and white? A nigger that’s masturbating himself!