The husband who wants a happy marriage should learn to keep his mouth shut and his chequebook open.

 165

0  

Why do men want to marry virgins? They can't stand criticism.

 231

0  

The trouble with some women is that they get all excited about nothing – and then they marry him.

 179

0  

Two old people flirt at a seniors' singles bar. After a few drinks, the old man asks the old woman, "If I took you out for a full night of wining, dining and dancing, what would you wear?" The old woman replies shyly, "Depends..." "Depends on what?" he asks. "On my bottom - where else?!"

 1724

1  

My wife constantly complains that I never listen to her… Or something like that.

 181

0