He was in a position to marry anyone he pleased. Unfortunately he didn’t please anyone.
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Two Italian virgins marry and go on their honeymoon. Unfortunately, neither knows what to do when they get there. The newlyweds call the groom's mother for advice. The mother says that they should sit on the bed together, snuggle, and things should happen from there. The newlyweds do this, but nothing happens. The groom calls his mother back. She says they should take their clothes off, get under the covers, and nature should take its course. The bride and groom take his mother's advice, but still nothing comes to mind. He calls his mother a third time. Getting frustrated with th ... read more
 336
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How did Barack propose to Michelle? He got on one knee, pulled out a ring, and said "I don't wanna be obamaself."
 676
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A man is on his deathbed. ‘Grant me one last wish, my dear,’ he gasps pitifully to his wife. ‘Six months after I die I want you to marry Joe.’ ‘But I thought you hated Joe,’ says his wife. ‘I do,’ says the man.
 174
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Wife: Why do you go out in the balcony, when I start singing. Husband: Because the people would think I am beating you.
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