There’s a lot to be said about marriage, but we try not to say it in front of the children.

 193

0  

Man: "What you have prepared to eat today?" Wife: "Nothing." Man: "But you did nothing yesterday." Wife : "I made it for two days."

 185

0  

Getting married is very much like going to a restaurant with friends. You order what you want, then when you see what the other person’s got, you wish you’d ordered that.

 197

0  

A newlywed couple goes on their honeymoon. Two days into the weeklong trip, the wife goes to the front desk and demands a car to take her to the airport. A few hours later, the husband strolls past the front desk. The manager asks why his wife has left the island. "Were you not having a good time?" The man replies, "Well, I've been having the best time of my life, but it's been with the maid."

 141

0  

Wife: Why do you go out in the balcony, when I start singing. Husband: Because the people would think I am beating you.

 154

0