Q: What is the show cesium and iodine love watching together? A: CSI
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A guy dies whilst making love to his wife. A few days later the undertaker calls her and says, "Your husband still has a hard-on, what shall I do with it?" The wife replies, "Cut it off and shove it up his arse!" The undertaker does as he is told. On the day of the funeral the wife visits her husband for the last time and sees a tear rolling down his face, so she whispers in his ear, "It fucking hurts doesn't it!"
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A teenager is a hopeless romantic who never falls in love more then twice a week.
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Q: Why do hipsters love ice? A: Because ice was water before it was cool.
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When Adam asked Eve out for dinner she replied: "Oh I'd love to, but I haven't a thing to wear."
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