Terrorists take a group of lawyers hostage. They ask for a ransom of $20 million and threaten to release one lawyer at a time if not given what they ask for.
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Girls are always taking your hoodies but you take one of their dresses and suddenly they're all like "we need to talk."
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If my main parachute doesn't open and my reserve parachute doesn't open, how long till i hit the ground? The rest of your life...
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Life is like a box of chocolates: A lot of people can't stand the dark ones.
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Two politician are having lunch together, all of a sudden one stood up and shouted, "Your lying." The other replied, "I know but just hear me out."
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