There’s one good thing about life. It’s only temporary.

 195

0  

Los Angeles Homeless... Homeless people here are different. You ever notice that? Our homeless people are serious, man. They have signs that not only say, "Will work for food," some of them have what they want: "Baked potato, salad, shrimp, sweet potato pie, sour chives."

 264

0  

Teeth says to tongue: if I just press a little, you'll get cut. Tongue replies: if i misuse a single word, all 32 of you will come out.

 188

0  

Behind every successful man, there is a woman. Behind every dead man, there is Chuck Norris.

 291

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I'm tired 8 days a week.

 3550

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