*Me when I turn 18* Parents: Do this. Me: Dobby has no master. Dobby is a free elf.
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Most babies born today are very young.
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One day Pepito was having a shower with his father when he saw his fathers penis. He asked his father what it was and his father replied "this is my racing car". The next night Pepito heard moaning in his parents room, being curious he peeped in to see what was happening. He then saw his father on top of his mother, while looking his father saw him and told him to go to his room. "OK, but I'm not sure you're driving that racing car properly" replied Pepito.
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What do you get if you cross a grizzly bear and a harp? (A bear-faced lyre!)
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Children: You spend the first 2 years of their life teaching them to walk and talk. Then you spend the next 16 years telling them to sit down and shut-up.
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