Two Jewish guys are walking when one notices a sign on a Catholic church that says "Convert to Christianity, and we'll give you $100." The one says to the other, "should we do it?" The other says "NO!! Are you crazy?" The first guy replies "Hey, a hundred dollars is a hundred dollars... I'm gonna do it." So he walks in to the church, and little while later, he walks back out. The friend says "well, did you get the money?" He replies "Oh that's all you people think about, isn't it?"

 1697

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This older Jewish man was on the operating table awaiting surgery and he insisted that his son, a renowned surgeon, perform the operation. As he was about to receive the anesthesia he asked to speak to his son. "Yes Dad, what is it?" "Don’t be nervous, son, do your best and just remember, if it doesn’t go well, if something happens to me… your mother is going to come and live with you and your wife…"

 718

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Q: What's faster than a speeding bullet? A: A Jew with a coupon.

 524

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The whole idea of Jesus dying to pay for our sins is bullshit. Jews don't pay for anything.

 1375

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Whats the difference between a pizza and a jew? A pizza doesn't scream when you put it in the oven.

 518

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