The answer to all the questions on your history test tomorrow is Chuck Norris.

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“The Day the Earth Stood Still” is based off the one day in Earth’s history when Chuck Norris slept.

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Who's the biggest prostitute in history? Ms. Pacman, for 25 cents that b*tch swallowed balls till she died.

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Only once in history has Chuck Norris snapped his fingers, scientists call it The Big Bang.

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How did the Vikings send secret messages? By norse code! Why did the knight run about shouting for a tin opneder? He had a bee in his suit of armour! Teacher: Who can tell me where Hadrians Wall is? Pupil: I expect it’s around Hadrian’s garden miss! Why were the early days of history called the dark ages? Because there were so many knights!

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