Chuck Norris once round house kicked a fat kid in the stomach and his foot print stayed their until the kid lost the weight.
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What's funnier than cancer? Most things, really.
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Your moma is so ugly...she could make medicine sick!
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The wife told me to talk to her like she was special the other day. So I said, "gooooo ... annddd ... makkee ... meeee ... a ... cuuuppp ... offffff ... coofffeeeeeee ..."
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Patient to friend: "I saw the doctor to day about my loss of memory." Friend: "What did he do?" Patient: "He made me pay him in advance."
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