What’s the sex? The sex in a disease. You always get in bed because of it.
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Blonde walks into a doctors office and says: "Doctor, what’s the problem with me? When I touch my arm, ouch! It hurts... When I touch my leg, ouch! it hurts... When I touch my head, ouch! It hurts... When I touch my chest, ouch! it really hurts!" The Doctor replies: "Your finger is broken."
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Chuck Norris' tears cure cancer. Too bad he has never cried.
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When Chuck Norris gets nominated for the ALS ice bucket challenge, the bucket donates $1000 to ALS research.
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Chuck Norris was once tested for steroids. The results came back positive. When confronted with this information, Chuck Norris chuckled and said, "Of course, what do you think they make steroids from?"
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