What do you get when you cross Billy Ray Cyrus with a yeast infection?
An itchy, twitchy twat!
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Did you hear about the Easter egg hunt for the Alzheimer's patients?
They hid their own eggs!
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The wife told me to talk to her like she was special the other day.
So I said, "gooooo ... annddd ... makkee ... meeee ... a ... cuuuppp ... offffff ... coofffeeeeeee ..."
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Q. Why is it okay for dumb blonde's to catch cold?
A. They don't have to worry about blowing their brains out.
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Boy: "Hi, my name is Milk. I'll do your body good."
Girl: "Sorry, I'm Lactose intolerant!"