The husband had been slipping in and out of a coma for several months yet the wife stayed by his bedside every single day. When he came back to his senses, he motioned for her to come nearer. As she sat by him, he said, "You know what? You have been with me all through the bad times. When I got fired, you were there to support me. When my business fell, you were there. When I got shot, you were by my side. When we lost the house, you gave me support. When my health started failing, you were still by my side. When I think about it now. ....I think you bring me bad luck!"
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What do you do for exercise? I lift weights. What do you do for cardio? I lift weights faster.
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Q: How can you tell you have a really bad case of acne? A: It's when the blind try to read your face.
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Q: How did the medical community come up with the term "PMS"? A: "Mad Cow Disease" was already taken.
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When Chuck Norris has a heart attack, he attacks back.
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