Programmer. A person who fixed a problem that you don't know you have, in a way you don't understand.

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Q: What did the dentist say to the computer? A: This won't hurt a byte

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A group of computer science geeks were listening to a lecture about Java programming at a university. After the lecture, one of the men leaned over and grabbed a woman’s breast. Woman: Hey! That’s private OK ? The man hesitated for a second looking confused. Man: But I thought we were in the same class.

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Programmer. A machine that turns coffee into code.

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A foo walks into a bar, takes a look around and says: "Hello world!"

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