My Girlfriend broke up with me. She thinks that I am childish. So I calmed down, took a deep breath, went to her house, rang the doorbell and ran away.

 411

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A local barber in my area just got arrested for selling drugs. Blew my mind. I’ve been his customer for years. I had no idea he was a barber.

 406

1  

Q: What has many keys but can't open any doors? A: A piano.

 804

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Mom: Do you think I’m a bad mom Jimmy? Son: Mom, my name is Jack!

 789

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Did you hear about the blind carpenter who picked up his hammer and saw? Did you hear about the deaf shepherd who gathered his flock and heard (herd)? If you don't understand these, use your dictionary and look up the words "blind," "deaf," "saw," "heard" and "herd."

 719

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