I visited my EX girlfriend and she gave me food.
After a few second their dog came in and started to jump over and I said “this dog loves visitors”
A child replied, “No! No! Uncle, the problem is that you are using its plate”.
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Mom: Do you think I’m a bad mom Jimmy?
Son: Mom, my name is Jack!
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Boy: hey babe can I show you something?
Girl: sure babe
Boy: can I show this in your room?
Girl: OK
Boy: can we close the window?
Girl: sure
Boy: can you close the door?
Girl: okay (grasping)
Boy: can you turn off the lights?
Girl: sure (even grasping)
Boy: grab my hand
Girl: (grab his hand) what is it, babe?
Boy: look at this, my watch can glow in the dark
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Boy: (calls 911) Hello, I need your help!
911: Alright, What is it?
Boy: Two girls are fighting over me!
911: So what’s your emergency?
Boy: The ugly one is winning.
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A guy went for an interview at a big IT company for the position of “Computer Hacking Investigator”
The boss asked him: So, what makes you suitable for this job?
Well, he replied, I hacked into your computer and invited myself to this interview.
