My Girlfriend broke up with me. She thinks that I am childish. So I calmed down, took a deep breath, went to her house, rang the doorbell and ran away.

 510

0  

I visited my EX girlfriend and she gave me food. After a few second their dog came in and started to jump over and I said “this dog loves visitors” A child replied, “No! No! Uncle, the problem is that you are using its plate”.

 749

0  

Boy: hey babe can I show you something? Girl: sure babe Boy: can I show this in your room? Girl: OK Boy: can we close the window? Girl: sure Boy: can you close the door? Girl: okay (grasping) Boy: can you turn off the lights? Girl: sure (even grasping) Boy: grab my hand Girl: (grab his hand) what is it, babe? Boy: look at this, my watch can glow in the dark

 1187

0  

Teacher: Can you see God? Student: No Teacher: Can you touch God? Student: No Teacher: Then there is no God Student: Ma’am can you see your brain? Teacher: No Student: Can you touch your brain? Teacher: No Student: Okay! No comments!!

 1214

2  

I was in a cab today and the cab driver said, “I love my job, I’m my own boss. Nobody tells me what to do.” Then I said, “Turn Left”.

 512

0