"Well," snarled the tough old Navy Chief to the bewildered Seaman, "I suppose after you get discharged from the Navy, you'll just be waiting for me to die so you can come and piss on my grave." "Not me, Chief!" the Seaman replied. "Once, I get out of the Navy, I'm never going to stand in line again!

 1937

5  

Q: Why are there only two paulbears at a black guys funeral? A: There are only two handles on a garbage can.

 581

0  

Q: What's the slowest thing on 80 wheels? A: A Mexican funeral with only two sets of jumper cables.

 610

0  

A man is at his lawyer's funeral and and is surprised by the turnout for this one man. He turns to the people around him. "Why are you all at this man's funeral?" A man turns towards him and says, "We're all clients." "And you ALL came to pay your respects? How touching." "No, we came to make sure he was dead."

 668

0  

Chuck Norris wears white to a funeral, no one asks why.

 540

0