Spilled milk cries over Chuck Norris.

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Chuck Norris's favourite drink is diamond juice, which he squeezes out of raw diamonds with his bare hands.

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What do you call a school bus full of black people? A rotten banana.

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A man visits his doctor with celery stalks stuck in each ear and a carrot stick up each nostril. He mumbles, "Doc, I'm just not feeling well." The doctor replies, "Maybe you're not eating right."

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Los Angeles Homeless... Homeless people here are different. You ever notice that? Our homeless people are serious, man. They have signs that not only say, "Will work for food," some of them have what they want: "Baked potato, salad, shrimp, sweet potato pie, sour chives."

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