The cannibal priest told his flock to close their eyes and say grace. "For whosoever we are about to eat, may the Lord make us truly thankful."

Facebook is like a fridge. Even when u know there's nothing new going on, u still go on & check it every 10 minute.

Three guys are stranded on a island; black guy, white guy, and a Mexican. They come across a Indian tribe, the chief said" go into the forest and pick a fruit and bring it back. We are going to shove it up your ass, if you scream we will cut off your head". The white guy goes in and brings back a banana they shove it up his ass he screamed soo they cut off his head. The Mexican goes in and comes back with a grape they shove it up his ass he screams. They all look at his and ask" why you scream?" The Mexican says" because the black guy is coming back with a watermelon.

Why did the dolphin feel crabby? Because he ate too many crabs.

If a hungry shark is after you, what should you feed it? Jawbreakers.