If I wanted to hear from an a**hole I would fart.

 481

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How many skunks do you need to make a house really smelly? Just a phew.

 262

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A very popular girl went to her doctor and found out that she was pregnant. The doctor says, “I know that you are not married! Do you know who the father of this baby is?” The girl thought and then asked, “Doc, if you ate a can of Baked Beans, would you know which bean made you fart?”

 590

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Yo' Mama is so dumb, if her brains were farts, there wouldn't be enough to stink.

 514

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Why should you only put 239 beans in bean soup? Cuz one more will make it "too farty!"

 474

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