Charlie Sheen is a drug, it will melt your face and kill you. Chuck Norris had two 8-Balls of Sheen and is now suing for false advertising.

 287

0  

Q: Whats the difference between Amy Winehouse and Captain Morgan? A: Captain Morgan comes alive when you add coke!

 599

0  

Chuck Norris once ate a whole bucket of sleepng pills and it managed to make him yawn.

 429

0  

Doctor (to an absent-minded patient): "What is wrong with you?" Patient: "I am losing my memory. Please prescribe some medicine." Doctor (Handing him the prescription after a while): "Here, Take this." Patient: "Why are you giving me this prescription? I am perfectly all right."

 1295

0  

I'm trying to write a joke about overdosing on cocaine. But I need a line to end it.

 455

0