I am a dog And you are a flower. I lift my leg up And give you a shower.

"Does your dog bite?" "No." (Tries to touch dog. Dog bites him) "Argh! I thought you said your dog doesn't bite!" "That is not my dog."

I named my dog Chuck Norris, but I couldn't train him because no one tells Chuck Norris what to do.

A blonde returned home from work and was shocked to find her house ransacked and burglarized. She called the police immediately to report the crime. The police dispatcher broadcast the call on the channels and a K-9 unit patrolling nearby was the first to respond. As the K-9 officer approached the house with his dog on a leash, the blonde ran out onto the porch. The sight of the cop and his dog made her shudder. She put her face in her hands as she sat down on the steps and began moaning. "What's the moaning all about, ma'am?" asked the officer. The blonde replied, "I come home to fi ... read more

Why was the cannibal looking peeky? Because he had just eaten a Chinese dog!