What is the definition of revenge?
A baby with a dog in its mouth.
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Question: If your dog is barking at the back door and your wife is yelling at the front door, who do you let in first?
Answer: The dog, because he’ll shut up after you let him in.
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Yo' Mama is so nasty, when she walks the dog, they both use the same bush.
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Q: What do a nearsighted gynecologist and a dog have in common?
A: Wet noses.
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Q: Why do dogs lick their balls?
A: Because they can.
Q: So why do they stick their noses in women's crotches?
A: Same reason.