A man walks into his doctor's office and whines, "Doc, you've got to help me; I've got a strawberry stuck up my ass."
The doctor pulls out his prescription pad and says, "I've got cream for that!"
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Yo mama so stupid she tried to make an appointment with Dr.pepper.
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A man is at the optometrist getting his eyes checked.
"You need to stop masturbating so much," the optometrist says.
"Why?" asks the man. "Is it going to make me go blind?"
The optometrist looks around and says "no, but it's making the other patients very uncomfortable."
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Patient goes to Doctor, doctor starts looking at him...
- Good, good, good...
- Doctor, what's good?
- Good that I don't have what you have...
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One day a Blonde went the doctor with a burn on her stomach.
The doctor gasped and asked what happened. the Blonde told the doctor she put a lighter against her stomach.
The doctor asked her why in the world she would do that. the blond said "I was trying to burn calories."