When is the best time to bury that baby you killed? When it starts talking to you again.

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Q: How can you tell if a woman is wearing pantyhose? A: Her ankles swell up when she farts.

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What do you call a trash bag full of mutilated laboratory monkeys? Rhesus Pieces.

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Why fart and waste when you can burp and taste?

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What's small, and red, and full of holes? A baby on a bed of nails.

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