Q: Why is it a bad idea for two butt cheeks to get married? A: Because they part for every little shit.

Q: How can you tell if you're in a gay church? A: Only half the congregation is kneeling.

What do you if you're trapped inside a whale? Run round and round till you're all pooped out!

Why did President Clinton name his dog Buddy instead of Spot? Because he didn't want people running around the White House saying, "come Spot, come Spot!"

Two statues, male and female, faced each other in the city park for many years. An angel appeared before the statues and said, "Since the two of you have been exemplary statues and have brought enjoyment to many people, I am giving you the gift of life. You have 30 minutes to do whatever you desire." The statues came to life and smiled at each other. They ran toward some nearby woods and dove behind a couple of bushes. The angel smiled to himself as he listened to the two statues giggling, bushes rustling and twigs snapping. After 15 minutes, the two statues emerged from the bushes, sat ... read more