Q: How can you tell if a bank robber is gay? A: He ties up the safe and blows the guard.

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Q: What did one gay sperm say to the other gay sperm? A: "How are we supposed to find an egg in all this sh*t?"

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A married couple go to a restaurant. A blonde waitress takes their order and returns several minutes later, carrying a plate with only a plain hamburger bun on it. The man asks, "Where's the burger?" The waitress lifts her arm and pulls out a burger from her armpit. "I was keeping it warm," she replies. The wife says, "Please cancel my hot dog order."

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Jeremy and Kris walk down the street and see a dog licking himself. Jeremy says, "Man, I wish I could do that!" Kris replies, "I think you'd have to pet him first."

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I have a green nose, three red mouths, and four purple ears. What am I? Ugly!

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