Q: What's the difference between an epyleptic oyster shucker and a prostitute with diahrrea? A: One shucks between fits.

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Q: How do you know you're in a vampire bar? A: There's a string hanging out of your Bloody Mary.

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Q: What do parsley and pubic hair have in common? A: You push them both aside when you eat.

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Q: What do you call a Puerto Rican midget? A: A spec.

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An asp in the grass is a snake, but a grasp in the ass is a goose.

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