Q: Why did Captain Kirk piss on the roof of the Enterprise? A: To boldly go where no man has gone before.
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Why can't girls play hockey? Because their pads can't last three periods.
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A pretty blonde woman is driving down a country road when her car breaks down. She goes to the nearest farmhouse and knocks on the door. When the farmer answers, she says to him, "My car broke down! I don't know what to do! Can I stay here for the night until I can get some help tomorrow?" "Well," drawls the farmer, "you can stay here, but I don't want you messin' with my sons Jed and Luke." The blonde looks through the screen door and sees two men standing behind the farmer. "Okay," she says. After going to bed, the woman begins to get a little hot thinking about the two boys in the ... read more
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Q: What do you call a man with no arms or legs, with a ten inch penis? A: "Partially disabled."
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Q: What do you get when you mix cigarettes with hot water? A: A soggy butt.
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