Q: How is a pussy like a grapefruit? A: The best ones squirt when you eat them.
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Q: What's the ultimate rejection? A: When you're masturbating and your hand falls asleep.
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A few days before his proctological exam, a one eyed man accidentally swallowed his glass eye. He was worried for a while, but there were no ill effects, so he forgot about it. Once he was in the doctor's office, the man followed instructions, undressed, and bent over. The first thing the proctologist saw when he looked up the man's arse was that eye staring right back at him. "You know, " said the doctor, "you really have to learn to trust me."
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Q: How do you embarrass an archaeologist? A: Give him a used tampon and ask him which period it came from
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How do you know you're at a bulimic bachelor party? When the cake jumps out of the girl!
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