A teacher is talking to a student.
Teacher: Did your father help you with your homework?
Student: No, he did it all by himself.
1053
0
Grandfather: When I was your age, I used to go to the market with two Rupees and bring home soap, rice, milk, bread, ghee, face powder etc.
Grandson: nowadays it is difficult. There are CCTV cameras everywhere.
3076
4
Doctor: I’m sorry but you suffer from a terminal illness and have only 10 to live.
Patient: What do you mean by 10? 10 what? Years? Months? Weeks?!
Doctor: Nine..
Patient: What?
Doctor: Eight..
1756
0
Teacher: Anyone who thinks he’s stupid may stand up!
*Nobody stands up*
Teacher: I’m sure there are some stupid students over here!
*Little Johnny stands up*
Teacher: Oh, Johnny you think you’re stupid?
Little Johnny: No… I just feel bad that you’re standing alone.
991
0
Boy: hey babe can I show you something?
Girl: sure babe
Boy: can I show this in your room?
Girl: OK
Boy: can we close the window?
Girl: sure
Boy: can you close the door?
Girl: okay (grasping)
Boy: can you turn off the lights?
Girl: sure (even grasping)
Boy: grab my hand
Girl: (grab his hand) what is it, babe?
Boy: look at this, my watch can glow in the dark
