Graham Alexander Bell: I used to study under a candle William Shakespeare: I used to study under street light Mr. Bean: What did you guys do during the daytime?

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A teacher is talking to a student. Teacher: Did your father help you with your homework? Student: No, he did it all by himself.

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Teacher: Anyone who thinks he’s stupid may stand up! *Nobody stands up* Teacher: I’m sure there are some stupid students over here! *Little Johnny stands up* Teacher: Oh, Johnny you think you’re stupid? Little Johnny: No… I just feel bad that you’re standing alone.

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Q: What has many keys but can't open any doors? A: A piano.

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Q: Can a kangaroo jump higher than the Empire State Building? A: Yes, because the Empire State Building can't jump!

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