Boy: Hey, you look so beautiful
Girl: Aww. Thank you. I don’t know what to say.
Boy: Just lie something, like I did.
981
0
A man was complaining to a railroad engineer.
What's the use of having a train schedule if the trains are always late.
The railroad engineer replied.
How would we know they were late, if we didn't have a schedule?
812
0
A man meets an accident with his new Ferrari.
A policeman arrives.
Man: (Cried) Officer! My brand new car!
Police: You’re such a materialistic person. You even haven’t notice that your left arm has been cut off.
Man: (He looks at his left arm and yells) OMG! My Rolex watch!
762
0
John: Bro I’ve invited 17 people to watch a movie, would you come?
Bro: ok John, but why so many people?
John: Because the DVD said “Only 18+ viewers.”
Bro: Wait, what?
798
0
Son: Give me money for gym
Mom: Will you become John Cena by going to the gym?
Son: Am I becoming Einstein by going to school?
