Q: Can a kangaroo jump higher than the Empire State Building?
A: Yes, because the Empire State Building can't jump!
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Graham Alexander Bell: I used to study under a candle
William Shakespeare: I used to study under street light
Mr. Bean: What did you guys do during the daytime?
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Doctor: I’m sorry but you suffer from a terminal illness and have only 10 to live.
Patient: What do you mean by 10? 10 what? Years? Months? Weeks?!
Doctor: Nine..
Patient: What?
Doctor: Eight..
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John: Bro I’ve invited 17 people to watch a movie, would you come?
Bro: ok John, but why so many people?
John: Because the DVD said “Only 18+ viewers.”
Bro: Wait, what?
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Q: What has many keys but can't open any doors?
A: A piano.