Q: Why did the elves spell Christmas N-O-E?
A: Because Santa had said, "No L!"
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What do you call an elf who tells silly jokes?
A real Christmas Card!
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Yo mamma so fat I took a picture of her last Christmas and its still printing.
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Q: What did the deaf, blind, mute girl get for Christmas?
A: Cancer.
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Alfie was listening to his sister practice her singing.
"Sis," he said, "I wish you'd sing Christmas carols."
"Thats nice of you, Alfie," she replied, "but why?"
Alfie replied, "Because then I'd only have to hear your voice once a year!"
