Yo momma is so fat, I took a picture of her last Christmas and its still printing.
 746
0  

A friend was in front of me coming out of church one day, and the preacher was standing at the door as he always is to shake hands. He grabbed my friend by the hand and pulled him aside. The Pastor said to him, "You need to join the Army of the Lord!" My friend replied, "I'm already in the Army of the Lord, Pastor." Pastor questioned, "How come I don't see you except at Christmas and Easter?" He whispered back, "I'm in the secret service."
 2164
1  

Q: Why do Mexicans have tamales for Christmas? A: So they'll have something to unwrap.
 819
0  

Q: What is an atheist's favorite Christmas movie? A: "Coincidence on 34th Street"
 1288
0  

What did the black kid get for Christmas? YOUR BIKE!
 643
0