Yo momma is so fat, I took a picture of her last Christmas and its still printing.

Yo mamma so fat I took a picture of her last Christmas and its still printing.

On Christmas morning a cop on horseback is sitting at a traffic light, and next to him is a kid on his brand new bike. The cop says to the kid, "Nice bike you got there. Did Santa bring that to you?" The kid says, "Yeah." The cop says, "Well, next year tell Santa to put a tail-light on that bike." The cop then proceeds to issue the kid a $20.00 bicycle safety violation ticket. The kid takes the ticket and before the cop rides off says, "By the way, that's a nice horse you got there. Did Santa bring that to you?" Humoring the kid, the cop says, "Yeah, he sure did." The kid says, "Well, ... read more

How are Justin Bieber and a Christmas tree similar? Both their balls are decoration only.

Q: Why did the elves spell Christmas N-O-E? A: Because Santa had said, "No L!"