This woman walks into a tattoo parlor and asks for a tattoo of a christmas tree on her right inner thigh and a cocktail drink on her left inner thigh. The tatoo artist say thats an unusual request. "Why do you want two tattoos there?" So she says "Because my husband needs to eat between christmas and new years."

 1419

0  

What do you call an elf who tells silly jokes? A real Christmas Card!

 1348

0  

Q: Why do Mexicans have tamales for Christmas? A: So they'll have something to unwrap.

 736

0  

The Grinch steals Christmas from Santa, Chuck Norris steals Christmas from the Grinch.

 984

0  

Two young boys were spending the night at their grandparents the week before Christmas. At bedtime, the two boys knelt beside their beds to say their prayers when the youngest one began praying at the top of his lungs. "I PRAY FOR A NEW BICYCLE..." "I PRAY FOR A NEW NINTENDO..." "I PRAY FOR A NEW STEREO..." His older brother leaned over and nudged the younger brother and said, "Why are you shouting your prayers? God isn't deaf." To which the little brother replied, "No, but Grandma is!"

 632

0