The following conversation took place after a recently deceased Pakistani man knocked on the gates of Heaven for about 5 minutes. St. Peter: "What do you want? " Pakistani man: "I'm here for Jesus." St. Peter: "Jesus, your taxi's her!! "
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What happened when the cannibal bit off a missionary's ear? He had his first taste of Christianity!
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Christian Doctor: "Your recovery was a miracle!" Christian Patient: "Thank God! Now I don't have to pay you."
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The main distinction between a boss and the Pope is the Pope only expects you to kiss his ring.
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A friend was in front of me coming out of church one day, and the preacher was standing at the door as he always is to shake hands. He grabbed my friend by the hand and pulled him aside. The Pastor said to him, "You need to join the Army of the Lord!" My friend replied, "I'm already in the Army of the Lord, Pastor." Pastor questioned, "How come I don't see you except at Christmas and Easter?" He whispered back, "I'm in the secret service."
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