The only reason Osama Bin Laden is dead is because they finally let Chuck Norris into Pakistan...
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Q: What does Superman, Batman, and Ironman have in common? A: When they were kids they wanted to be Chuck Norris
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At a government affair, the wives of four world leaders are chatting about how people refer to a penis in their countries. The wife of Tony Blair says in England people call it a gentleman, because it stands up when women are entering. The wife of Boris Yeltsin says in Russia you call it a patriot, because you never know if it will hit you on the front or on the back side. The wife of Chirac says in France you call it a curtain, because it goes down after the act. With great resignation, the wife of Clinton says in the USA you call it a rumor, because it goes from mouth to mouth…
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Uri Geller bends spoons with his mind, Chuck Norris bends minds with a spoon.
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Chuck Norris was once on Celebrity Wheel of Fortune and was the first to spin. The next 29 minutes of the show consisted of everyone standing around awkwardly, waiting for the wheel to stop.
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