Schrödinger's cat walks into a bar and doesn't.

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Yo' Mama is so stupid, she thought Meow Mix was a rap CD for cats.

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A man brings his cat to a veterinarian. He lives the cat there and returns in two days, as preagreed. He asks the veterinarian: Is my cat still alive? Still not...

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Q: Who was the first cat to fly in an airplane? A: Kitty-hawk

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A woman took her dog to the vet. She said, "I think my dog is dead". The doctor laid the dog on the table and reached down and took a cat out of a box. The cat walked all over the dog and the dog didn't move. "Yes, your dog is dead," says the doctor. "How much do I owe you?" the lady asks. "$345," says the doctor. "$345!!?" the lady asks. "Yes. $45 for the office visit and $300 for the cat scan."

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