If Chuck Norris were a cat he would have ten lives.

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Q: What is a black cat's favorite color? A: Purrrrrr-ple!

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Q: Why did the silly kid try to feed pennies to the cat? A: Because his mother told him to put money in the kitty.

 1444

2  

An old woman wanted to travel by bus to the pet cemetery with the remains of her cat. As she boarded the bus, she whispered to the driver, I have a dead pussy. The driver pointed to the woman in the seat behind him and said, "Sit with my wife. You two have a lot in common."

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Now I lay me down to sleep, I pray this cushy life to keep. I pray for toys that look like mice, And sofa cushions, soft and nice. I pray for gourmet kitty snacks, And someone nice to scratch my back, For windowsills all warm and bright, For shadows to explore at night. I pray I'll always stay real cool And keep the secret feline rule To never tell a human that The world is really ruled by cats!

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