How do you make a cat be a dog? Pour gasoline on it and light it with a match. It will go 'WOOF.'

Q: Why did the silly kid try to feed pennies to the cat? A: Because his mother told him to put money in the kitty.

A boy asks his mother for breakfast. She says, "Not until you feed the animals." The boy goes outside and says to the chicken, "I don't feel like feeding you today." So he kicks the chicken. He does the same with the cow and the pig. The boy goes back into the house and tells his mother that he's hungry. His mother says, "I saw you kick the chicken, so you're not getting any eggs, I saw you kick the cow, so you're not getting any milk, and I saw kick the pig, so you're not getting any bacon." Just then the boy's father walks down the steps, trips and kicks the cat. The boy says, " ... read more

How do you know if an Asian robbed you? Your homework is done and cats gone.

A man brings his cat to a veterinarian. He lives the cat there and returns in two days, as preagreed. He asks the veterinarian: Is my cat still alive? Still not...