Q: Why do men pay more for car insurance? A: Women don't get blow jobs while they're driving.

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A blonde was driving down the motorway when her car phone rang. It was her husband, urgently warning her, “Honey, I just heard on the news that there’s a car going the wrong way on the M25. Please be careful!” “It’s not just one car!” said the blonde. “There’s f*ck*ng hundreds of them!”

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When Chuck Norris touched a Prius, it turned into a Ferrari

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A motorist gets caught in an automated speed trap that photographs his car. He later receives a ticket in the mail for $40 with a photo of his car. Instead of payment, he sends the police department a photograph of $40. A few days later, he gets a letter from the police department with a picture of handcuffs.

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Q: Why can't gays drive faster than 68mph? A: Because at 69 they blow a rod.

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