When you're driving and Nicki Minaj is on all 3 radio stations at the exact same time, there's nothing left to do except crash your car.
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Q: What do you call a white guy who needs to go somewhere across town but does not own an automobile? A: A taxi.
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Chuck Norris saved 100% on his car insurance by switching to Geico.
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A cab driver reaches the pearly gates. St. Peter looks him up in his Big Book and tells him to pick up a gold staff and a silk robe and proceed into Heaven. Next in line is a preacher. St. Peter looks him up in his Big Book, furrows his brow and says, "OK, we'll let you in, but take that cloth robe and wooden staff." The preacher is shocked and replies, "But I am a man of the cloth. You gave that cab driver a gold staff and a silk robe. Surely I rate higher than a cabbie!" St. Peter responds matter-of-factly, "This is Heaven and up here, we are interested in results. When you preached, peop ... read more
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Why did the blond speed on the highway? Because she thought the cars behind her where chasing her!!!!
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