How do you drown a blonde? Put a scratch ’n sniff sticker at the bottom of a pool.

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Q: Why aren't blondes good cattle herders?  A: Because they can't even keep two calves together!

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A guy walks into a pub and sees a sign hanging over the bar that reads: CHEESEBURGER: $1.50 CHICKEN SANDWICH: $2.50 HAND JOB: $10.00 He walks up to the bar and beckons one of the three exceptionally attractive blondes serving drinks. "Can I help you?" she asks. "I was wondering," whispers the man. "Are you the one who gives the hand jobs?" "Yes," she purrs. "I am." The man replies, "Well, wash your hands. I want a cheeseburger."

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Q: What do blondes and beer bottles have in common? A: They're both empty from the neck up.

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Did you hear about the new blonde paint? It’s not very bright, but it’s cheap, and spreads easy.

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