Q: How does every black joke start? A: With the white guy looking over his shoulder.

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What's blue and flies around the room at high speeds? A baby with a punctured lung.

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They say that if I don't support transgender rights I'm on the wrong side of history. At least I'm on the right side of the firing squad.

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A guy dies whilst making love to his wife. A few days later the undertaker calls her and says, "Your husband still has a hard-on, what shall I do with it?" The wife replies, "Cut it off and shove it up his arse!" The undertaker does as he is told. On the day of the funeral the wife visits her husband for the last time and sees a tear rolling down his face, so she whispers in his ear, "It fucking hurts doesn't it!"

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The cannibal priest told his flock to close their eyes and say grace. "For whosoever we are about to eat, may the Lord make us truly thankful."

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