Why did Princess Diana cross the road? She wasn't wearing a seatbelt.

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I wish I could see things from your point of view, unfortunately I can't stick my head that far up my ass.

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What happened to the Pope when he went to Mount Olive? Popeye almost killed him!

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Q: How does every black joke start? A: With the white guy looking over his shoulder.

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When you're driving and Nicki Minaj is on all 3 radio stations at the exact same time, there's nothing left to do except crash your car.

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