How do you know when a baby is a dead baby? The dog plays with it more.
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Cannibals capture three men. The men are told that they will be skinned and eaten and then their skin will be used to make canoes. Then they are each given a final request. The first man asks to be killed as quickly and painlessly as possible. His request is granted, and they poison him. The second man asks for paper and a pen so that he can write a farewell letter to his family. This request is granted, and after he writes his letter, they kill him saving his skin for their canoes. Now it is the third man's turn. He asks for a fork. The cannibals are confused, but it is his fi ... read more
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Did you hear about the Easter egg hunt for the Alzheimer's patients? They hid their own eggs!
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Q: What's the difference between Jesus Christ and a painting of Jesus Christ? A: It only takes one nail to hang a painting.
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What would it take to reunite the Beatles? Two more bullets.
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