What does a skeleton say when he wants to eat? Bone appetit!
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Q: How can you tell you have a really bad case of acne? A: It's when the blind try to read your face.
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A bunch of new recruits are making their first parachute jump. The sergeant gives instructions: "After you jump out of the plane, count slowly to 10. Your parachute will automatically open. If it doesn't, pull the emergency cord. When you get to the drop zone, there'll be trucks waiting to take you back to the base. Move out!" As scared as they are, they all make it out the door. The last recruit jumps out and slowly counts to 10 -- nothing. He frantically fumbles around and finds the emergency handle. He jerks on the cord, and it comes off in his hand. Raising his head to the ... read more
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What do an airport and a illegal abortion have in common? The Hanger.
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How did the cannibal turn over a new leaf? He became a vegetarian.
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