So an old man, a Catholic priest, and a pedophile walk into a bar, and that's just one person!

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Q: What's the last thing you usually hear before a redneck dies? A: Hey y'all... Watch this!

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If you want to feed an injured woodpecker, take it by the tail and hit it to the tree.

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They say that if I don't support transgender rights I'm on the wrong side of history. At least I'm on the right side of the firing squad.

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Q: When does a pedophile go to sleep? A: When the big hand touches the small one.

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