So a guy is walking with a young boy into the woods.
Boy "Hey mister its getting dark out and I'm scared."
Man "How do you think I feel, I have to walk back alone."
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Me: "Here comes the airplane!"
Baby: Opens mouth.
Me: "OH NO! It's the Taliban!" Hits baby in the forehead with the spoon. "KA-BOOM"
512
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Q: Why does Dr. Pepper come in bottles?
A: Because his wife died.
289
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Who's the most famous Jewish cook in history?
Hitler.
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Q: How can you tell you have a really bad case of acne?
A: It's when the blind try to read your face.
