How many dead babies does it take to screw in a light bulb? As many as it takes to climb on top of them in order to reach the socket.

A priest, a rabbi and a vicar walk into a bar. The barman says, ''Is this some kind of joke?''

Me and my wife decided that we don't want to have children anymore. So anybody who wants one can leave us their phone number and address and we will bring you one.

A tourist is in Spain, and goes to a fancy restaurant for dinner. As he looks around, he notices a diner being served a beautifully garnished dish with two gigantic meatballs in the middle. When the waiter asks him for his order, the man asks him about the meatball dish. The waiter explains that the meatballs are bull's testicles, and when the bull loses the bullfight, the bull is brought to the restaurant, and this beautiful dish is made. The diner tells the waiter that he wants the bulls testicles for dinner, but the waiter tells him that only one bull a day is brought to the restauran ... read more

How can you tell if you have acne? If the blind can read your face.