Q: What's the only thing faster than a black man running away with your TV? A: His son running away with your VCR.

The reason why women will never be the ones who propose is that as soon as they get on their knees, man starts unzipping.

I want to die peacefully in my sleep, like my grandfather. Not screaming and yelling like the passengers in his car.

First cannibal: "Come and have dinner in our but tonight." Second cannibal: "What are you having?" First cannibal: "Hard-boiled legs."

One man enters in an ambulant and says to the doctor: Help me, please. I have a knife in my back. The doctor, looking his watch says: Now is 2:20 PM, and I work till 2, so as you can imagine I've finished for today, and I can’t help you. Be so kind and come tomorrow morning, at 8. But tomorrow morning I will be dead. You must help me now. The doctor, angrily says: I explained to you gently that I've finished my shift for today, and that I can't do nothing for you. You must pass here tomorrow. But, until tomorrow I will lose all my blood, and I will be dead. Don’t you see that I ... read more