What do sick cannibals have for breakfast? Vitamin bills!
 120
0  

A guy dies whilst making love to his wife. A few days later the undertaker calls her and says, "Your husband still has a hard-on, what shall I do with it?" The wife replies, "Cut it off and shove it up his arse!" The undertaker does as he is told. On the day of the funeral the wife visits her husband for the last time and sees a tear rolling down his face, so she whispers in his ear, "It fucking hurts doesn't it!"
 460
0  

*Wakes up to wife and son screaming* Me: "What are you guys yelling about?" Them: "You're driving!"
 240
0  

The best thing after an intensive argument is the peace-sex. But I hate when I argue with my father-in-law.
 653
0  

A single car crash kills a Mexican family. 15 people died.
 733
1