A woman, on meeting a psychologist at a party, made a pitch for some free professional advice. "What kind of toy would you suggest giving a little boy on his third birthday?" she asked. "First I’d have to know more about the child," the psychologist hedged. The woman took a deep breath. "He’s very bright and quick-witted and exceptionally advanced for his age," she said. "He has good coordination, expresses himself very well…" "Oh, I see," the psychologist said, "It’s YOUR child!"

 564

0  

You are so old, the candles on your birthday cake raised earths temperature by 3 degrees.

 6844

2  

What do you give Mikey for his 18th birthday? A 90 year old woman, because Mikey will eat anything.

 643

1  

This blonde goes into the drugstore looking for a birthday card. She asks the clerk if they have any new and different cards — something unusual. The clerk points her to a new card just in that day — “Happy Birthday to the Boy who Popped My Cherry.” The blonde replied, “How cool! I’ll take the whole box!”

 513

0  

Birthdays are good for your health. Studies have shown that people who have more birthdays live longer.

 691

0