What happens when you kiss a canary?
You get chirpes, it can't be tweeted because its a canarial disease.
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A man is driving happily along when he is pulled over by the police.
The copper approaches him and politely asks, "Have you been drinking, sir?"
"Why?" snorts the man.
"Is there a fat bird in my car?"
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The saying "Kill two birds with one stone" actually came from when chuck Norris downed two Peregrin Falcons with one roundhouse kick.
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Q: What do birds give out on Halloween?
A: Tweets!
