What's the fastest thing in the world?
A beer truck driving through an Indian reserve.
What's the second fastest thing in the world?
The Indians running after it.
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The bartender asks: "Would all three of you like some beer?"
The first one replies, "I don't know."
The second one replies, "I don't know either."
The third replies, "Yes."
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A woman came home to find her retired husband waving a rolled up newspaper round his head.
'What are you doing dear?'
'Swatting flies - I got 3 males and 2 females'
'How do you know what sex they were?'
The man very confidently replied, "Easy - 3 were on the beer and 2 were on the phone."
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Q: What is a redneck's last words?
A: Hold my beer and watch this!
