Your mamas so skinny she swallowed a meatball n thought she was pregnant.

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What is height of Laziness? Adopting a child.

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How do you make a baby drink? Stick it in the blender.

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Which branch of the military do babies join? The infantry!

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Me: "Here comes the airplane!" Baby: Opens mouth. Me: "OH NO! It's the Taliban!" Hits baby in the forehead with the spoon. "KA-BOOM"

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