Q: Why was the black baby crying? A: He had diarea and thought he was melting.

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Which is the only day you you are safe in a cannibal village? Sitter days (when they eat the baby-sitter instead)!

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Kim and Kanye naming their baby North West is just like Brad Pitt naming his kid Arm.

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A second grader came home from school and said to her mother, "Mom, guess what? We learned how to make babies today." The mother, more that a little surprised, tried to keep her cool. "That's interesting," she said, "How do you make babies?" "It's simple," replied the girl. "You just change 'y' to 'i' and add 'es'."

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Why did the zombie baby cross the road? He was stapled to the chicken.

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