Who held the baby octopus to ransom? Squidnappers.
 178
2  

Stonehenge was made by Chuck Norris stacking blocks as a baby.
 297
0  

Which is the only day you you are safe in a cannibal village? Sitter days (when they eat the baby-sitter instead)!
 216
0  

My wife is so negative. I remembered the car seat, the stroller, AND the diaper bag. Yet all she can talk about is how I forgot the baby.
 457
0  

"Jeff, my child, your mother had to stay in the hospital for a few days, cause the stork that brought your baby brother bite her by accident." "Oh, gosh! What a terrible thing to happen to her after such a difficult birth!"
 709
2